Surprisingly, now is the time of women who do not know how to break the most difficult and unpromising relationships. For them the question "How to part with a beloved man?" equated to life's ruin. The situation reaches the point of absurdity and tragedy. Let me remind you of a story that happened shortly before the New Year. Anastasia Ovchinnikova was killed by her civil husband. More like killed. A man beat his cohabitant for 5 hours, periodically stopping to take a photo and send it to friends - they say, look how I keep a woman in check. They tell how he had arranged similar scenes for her several times before. The last time right in the restaurant, from where he dragged her by the legs. Maxim Gribanov - that's the name of the freak - of course, complete scum. But I have another question for eyewitnesses - that is, is it normal when a person is humiliated and dragged by the legs in front of you? It is clear that, having learned from bitter experience, we do not interfere, but at least call the guards or the police? Or have they completely sunk down to the level of chewing "cattle", who only have bread and circuses, "kina" and popcorn? Didn't the neighbors hear how the woman was beaten for 5 hours? And, well, yes, one of them still could not stand it and called the girl's father. Father...! Not to the police. When he arrived it was already late - the beast beat the woman to such an extent that after 2 days she died in the hospital.

You probably think that Anastasia was a marginal, on the same level as her roommate? What she drank, led an asocial lifestyle. No, the photo is very sweet, even rather beautiful girl, quite intelligent appearance. But you know what brings her down to that bastard's level? Before her death, she asked not to start a criminal case against him - because ... she loved him very much.

How to painlessly part with a loved one

I don't even want to finish the previous paragraph. Women have lowered themselves to such a level that they tolerate everything - relationships with a married man, with a tyrant, with an abuser, with someone who beats and humiliates. Somewhere in the depths of their souls they understand everything, but if they think about anything, it’s only about what how to painlessly part with a loved one. But since this is impossible, they leave everything as it is. Some still manage to proudly declare (usually these are all-forgiving wives of traitors) - “others leave such husbands because they don’t love!” But we understand perfectly well that love for them is just a cover for a comfort zone and fear to take a decisive step. There is no female wisdom in enduring something for the sake of the family or trying to remake the bastard. Doom is there, wisdom is not. All I hear is: “I love him too much!” My dears, what you call love is something else entirely. Love addiction, fear of being alone or fear of suffering. But sometimes you need to be able to end the relationship and put an end to it. I can't and don't want to. Nobody says it will be easy - it won't work! We pay a price for everything in life. And for freedom from the villain, too. Be patient, go to a psychologist, work on yourself - then it will become easier. And it’s impossible to sit on a hedgehog and not get pricked. Life is hard, stop burying your head in the sand hoping that everything will work itself out somehow. Won't decide. Or it will be decided as in the example from the beginning of the article.

I will not part with my beloved, I will die for love

However, moralizing is absolutely useless. It is useless to inspire your girlfriends in what a deplorable situation they are and they need to do something. Just become enemies. Therefore, I always oppose all kinds of courses, coaches, etc., who teach life. Only a psychologist who will work with your condition, and not tell you how to. and “stop living with m ... mi!” This reason is called "I'll die for love!" It is based on incorrect upbringing and increased female emotionality.

I’ll say briefly about upbringing - while you inspire your daughters that the family (husband and children) is the main thing in a woman’s life, you raise potential slaves from them who endure anything just not to be left alone.

About heightened emotionality. It is known that most women are very emotional. Men too - but it's easier for them. More opportunities to get adrenaline - extreme sports, cars, at least just sports or physical activity. If it doesn’t help at all, they get a mistress and calmly combine with their wife. Women with all this is much more difficult. Relationships are often the only place they can get that adrenaline. Plus, films and all world literature help them. Poor Liza, who drowned herself in a pond after learning about her lover's engagement. Elaine, "the lily maiden of Astolat, who died of great love" for the knight Lancelot. Marianne from Sense and Sensibility, exclaiming “Die of love! What could be more beautiful!” Do you think this is a thing of the past? No matter how! Sveta Svetikova said in an interview how, at a tender age, she dreamed of "suffering from which the heart breaks." Therefore, we are not interested in good, responsible men - there is no adrenaline. And with the scum that's what you need. Why it is impossible to break up with a married man or a tyrant - because there are such emotional swings that a constant buzz is guaranteed. But the dose must be increased all the time, so insults are replaced by assault, followed by open violence. But this is how it should be - until you confess your love to the murderer before death. With a married one to one. First, unearthly love, and then an adrenaline rush from trying to figure out “you love me so much, why are we not together?” Wow!

How to break up with the man you love

To understand how to break up with the man you love First of all, you need to realize that this is not love at all. Love is free, does not bear suffering and is ready to let go. You also need to learn how to properly direct the flow of your excess emotional energy. There are enough examples when a woman, carried away by extreme sports, found the strength to break off a toxic relationship.

Next, think about the one you supposedly love and that love for this person is mostly invented by you to fill the inner void. It is in adolescence that the myth is appropriate that they love for nothing, just like that. As adults, we always love for something, but we prefer not to think about it because it's not romantic. We fall in love on the basis of chemistry and subconscious images, but the formula of love in reality is very simple: "respect + sex." Some still add general looks - but I consider this an addition, not a main one. Because whole people don't really need it. If we have passion for a person and at the same time respect him, then we love him. But in most failed relationships, we only have the first ingredient. We cannot respect a person who cheats on his wife, lies to us, betrays his children, leaving the family. We cannot respect a rapist who raises his hand, a traitor who tramples on your feelings and destroys a good relationship. We can continue to feel attracted to them - and even more and more strongly, because pain and suffering are also emotions that increase our passion and sense of ownership. But respect? We forget about him, because. emotions from suffering fill us completely. So think about it - is it love without respect or just addiction and painful attachment.

But when you realize that this is not love, but at the same time you still can’t break off the relationship yourself, then go to a specialist. True, hardly many admit to themselves that there is no love - after all, then life will be completely meaningless. And so - sacrifices in the name of love. Oh! Sign up with a psychologist.

For unfinished relationships in psychotherapy there is a term "gestalt". It means that the relationship has not been worked out to the end and fate will return us to the unfulfilled lesson. Perhaps with other people, but in similar situations. Therefore, it is always necessary to part to the end. For completion testing, choose one of your regular days. And in the evening, try to remember how many times you mentally returned to the old connection. If there are more than five such marks, this is already an alarm signal! A clear indicator of "stuck" is viewing the pages of the "former" in social networks. Why do you need his profile? What are you looking for there?

How to break up

There is no instruction on how to properly end a relationship. There are only tips on how to make everything less painful and more effective.

Burn your bridges

The correct break is when the relationship is completely completed and it is already impossible to return to them. The most important and most difficult thing is to let a person out of his thoughts. Ideally, remember briefly and with gratitude for the segment of the life path that you went through together.

State the reason for the breakup

It can be very difficult to explain to a partner the reason for the breakup, especially when you yourself are confused in your explanations and claims. However, you still need to try to identify those problems that do not suit you, and explain why you see no other way than parting. Remember, your arguments must be formulated clearly and understandably. They should not have a double meaning or the possibility of a different understanding than the one you are laying. Be careful with "life examples", they often look like an accusation.

Don't blame

Blame is the attitude of the weak. Before you stands a person whom you once loved and with whom you spent wonderful years (months, weeks - underline as necessary). He a priori does not deserve humiliation at such a difficult moment in your life together (and she is still together). Be above putting a person in a position of guilt, in this case it is better to take the fire upon yourself. Just don’t say those terrible “it’s not about you ...” - hackneyed words turned by cinema into a synonym for indifference.

rehearse

You will still say things differently, but the rehearsal makes sense. First, it will give you confidence. Secondly, it will set you in a decisive mood. Thirdly, if at the most crucial moment you are “locked in”, rehearsed phrases will pop up somewhere in your head that will save the situation from complete failure and shameful surrender.

Avoid romantic memories

Memories are the hardest thing to go through. Those evenings when you walked along the seashore, the romantic actions of the other half, the early summer breakfasts on his balcony ... We are sure that you will find something to remember, so force yourself to be silent about the past and interrupt the partner’s conversation if he decides to enter this forbidden land.

Pick a Neutral Location

This point follows from the previous one. No apartments, favorite parks or restaurants where you often visited or visit. Of course, you should not part in the metro lobby or at the bus stop, try to opt for something neutral. Let it be a place where neither you nor your partner have ever been and definitely will not be again. The place of parting should never again pop up on your map.

Don't offer to be friends

Offering to part as friends, you run the risk of again being in the unsuccessful role of a member of a dubious rom-com. In general, taking the example of parting with movie characters is by no means the best idea. At least by the fact that all their words are subject to the logic of the screenwriter, and not your life situation.

Don't go screaming

Shouts, yelling and mutual accusations in raised tones will not help the cause. Do not expect that this way the separation will be easier and less painful. It is possible that after a while you will regret what was said and decide to apologize ... What will happen next, we think you have already guessed. No, not the best sex in your life (although anything can happen, but still this is again a movie story), but a repetition of everything that made you decide to end the relationship, and at the end of the second round of breakups. This time even more painful.

Types of breakups

Positive break. When feelings have faded, partners are reasonable and internally free enough to have the courage to admit the meaninglessness of what is happening and say goodbye to each other. Usually in such couples, trusting relationships with children are maintained, and the separation in no way causes trauma to the future family scenario of the son or daughter.

Unfinished gestalt. Spouses or partners understand that the mutual fire has died down, the feeling of affection has crumbled, but the relationship must be preserved for the sake of invented, illusory reasons. For example, until the children grow up. Often in such families there are "triangles" and betrayals. Children who grow up in an atmosphere of constant lies receive a severe dysfunctional example of a family script. These children are future clients of the psychotherapist.

most painful fraught with neuroses and psychosomatic problems. A difficult, tragic breakup happens when one partner is not ready to let go of the other. This means that the non-letting one looks at the partner as property, denying him the right to have freedom of choice. Usually, at the reception of a psychotherapist, it is precisely the one who does not let go, who most often says: “But I love him!” or: “But he swore he loved me!” It comes from childhood. It is often extremely difficult to overcome the problem of letting go on your own - you need the help of a specialist who will develop adulthood and independence.

Parting is a rather painful process for both partners, especially if the feelings have not cooled down yet. It is important to understand yourself so as not to make a mistake and then not regret the act you have done. Psychologist's advice on how to break up with a man will help to soften the blow as much as possible. You should not put off the decision indefinitely, tormented by doubts and even more sorry for your partner, as this will only aggravate the situation. It is important to choose the right moment, taking into account both your own emotional state and the mood of the chosen one, so that the conversation does not turn into a scandal.

How to part with a man with dignity?

You should not approach this issue without thinking through every step, because there are many details that should be taken into account in order not to hurt your partner and smooth the situation as much as possible. There is no specific instruction on how to act, and psychologists only give useful advice for such a situation.

How beautiful it is to part with a man:

1. The conversation should be conducted eye to eye on neutral territory. It is important that there are no associations with him, for example, the place of the first kiss, etc. Crowded and noisy places are not suitable.
2. It is important to clearly identify the reason for the gap. Tell your partner what exactly you don’t like in the relationship, and why you don’t see any other outcome than parting. Reasons should not be double entendre. Try not to use examples from the past.
3. Speaking about how to part with the man you love, it is worth giving one more important piece of advice - control your own emotions. Even if the beloved indicates heartlessness and heartlessness, you should not succumb to provocations.
4. There should be no accusations and insults, since this is the first thing a woman shows her weakness. There is no need to try to make the partner guilty and it is best to take everything on yourself. Just don't use the terrible words "it's not about you", because they have long become synonymous with indifference.
5. Another important piece of advice on how to break up with a man who uses you or loves you, in no case give vain hopes. No need to offer friendship and avoid any reticence. Show your firmness and put an end to it. If everything goes well, then in the future the relationship will improve.
6. After all, you should not offer to drink coffee or take a walk together, as these are vain hopes. The best solution is to just get up and leave. In the same way, it is worth doing if a man began to show, blame, or, on the contrary, ask to stay. Be clear that this decision is final. At the same time, it is important to cut off all contacts, that is, delete it from social networks, block the phone, in general, delete it from your life. This will allow both partners to better survive the breakup and avoid scandals and showdowns.

There are also tips from psychologists that you should use if you still have feelings for a man, but you don’t want to renew the relationship. To start a new life, it is recommended to throw out all the emotions, this can be done with a girlfriend, at home in front of a mirror, or in any other way. Express everything that has accumulated in your heart. Devote free time to yourself, for example, study languages, travel, find, in general, do everything that will bring positive emotions and distract you from thoughts about your ex-lover. You can also change your appearance, for example, lose weight, get a new hairstyle or update your wardrobe. Try to spend a lot of time with friends and do not be afraid to make new acquaintances. All these tips will allow you to start life from scratch and completely forget about failed relationships.

You do not know how to break up with a guy? Has the love gone or has the relationship become unbearable? Then this article will help you. Understand, finally, in yourself and dot the "i" in the relationship.

Often girls, even if they decide that they want to part with their boyfriend, still have doubts about this. The ironclad reasons for breaking up a relationship will be described below:

• assault

According to statistics, in every 4th couple there are cases of psychological and physical violence. But less than 50% of these women decide to leave. The most annoying thing about this situation is that in 95% of couples, outbursts of physical attacks are repeated again and again. And over time, they only become more frequent.

This happens when a girl does nothing in her defense, but only continues to believe and hope that her partner will change. And only 5% of situations of assault by a man are one-time. In this case, they are caused by your wrong behavior.

What conclusion can be drawn from these data? Waiting for the correction of a young man who opens his hands in most cases does not make sense.

• He doesn't respect you

Does your boyfriend allow you to make fun of you in the company of friends? Or considers your thoughts empty chatter? A serious reason for breaking such a connection. Perhaps you think that this is a small minus of it, which covers a lot of good qualities. Think about how to live with such a person all your life. You will constantly feel stupid.

• You often quarrel

Is your relationship difficult to call balanced and harmonious? Do you often quarrel with your loved one and can't find a common language? This will be an ordeal for you. Even if at the moments of reconciliation you feel very good with this person, after a couple of years you will receive only the pain of disappointment and upset nerves.

• Your feelings have faded

Previously, you experienced warm feelings, but now love has passed. And you look at this person with surprise. You can't figure out why you liked it so much. This is a wake up call. Of course, some couples manage to return their former love back to normal. But for this you need to have at least a desire.

• He insults you

Does the guy increasingly turn to you in a rude manner? Heard from him an affectionate word, and you think, is it not a hallucination? A great reason to say goodbye to your beloved. Mutual respect is the foundation of a healthy relationship.

Case from practice:

Recently, Svetlana, 25 years old, came to us for a consultation, a young man who did not treat her very respectfully. Often he was rude to her, he could insult in public in the company of friends. But she could not break off relations with him, as she was strongly attached to him. Also important for her was the fact that, despite the insults, the young man completely suited her and was literally her dream.

After several consultations, we nevertheless found out that it would be a mistake to marry such a person. Together we decided to give the young man 4 months to correct. Of course, at first Svetlana spoke frankly with him. In the conversation, she made it clear that if he did not make an attempt to improve his attitude towards her, then they would have to leave.

The young man, for his part, also experienced strong feelings and did not want to leave. Therefore, he held on for 3 whole months, but, in the end, he still broke loose and yelled at her in public transport. This situation made Svetlana clearly understand that this shortcoming of her lover is difficult to fix. And most likely she will have to endure this for the rest of her life together. Therefore, the girl nevertheless decided to break off the relationship.

• Lack of attention

Boyfriend, despite your requests, gives you little attention. If you decide to legitimize the relationship, then, as the statistics show, it will only get worse. Coldness and indifference is what awaits you with such a husband.

• He is using you

Girls are very kind by nature. And when the flame of passion falls on them, they are ready to do literally everything for their lover. They will stop the galloping horse and enter the burning hut if the prince asks. Sometimes this goes beyond all limits, and the guy begins to use the excessive kindness of his admirer. Often without experiencing mutual love. Such relationships cannot be called normal.

• He lies a lot

Does your passion love to embellish everything said with a red word? Or even invent something that actually did not exist. Telling tales is a common thing for him, instead of honestly confessing. With such a grief - the groom, building a happy future will be the same unrealizable fairy tale that he tells.

• He is cheating on you

He cheated on you, and you are absolutely sure of it. This is not gossip and speculation of your girlfriends, but reliable information. Many girls doubt at this stage. The best advice here is to listen to your inner voice. If you have the strength and the main thing is to forgive, then this option is also possible.

Psychologist's advice: If in doubt, break off the relationship or not. Here are a few questions to help you decide. Think carefully and weigh the pros and cons:

• What will change if we break up?
• Maybe it would be better to try to change something in the relationship? Will I regret this decision?
• Can I be happy without him?
• Do I still have feelings for him? What exactly? Positive or negative? Love and tenderness or habit, irritation, fear of loneliness?
• Is this just what I need?
• Will I regret the breakup later?
• What's wrong with this guy?

What is the best way to break up?

Most psychologists vying with each other advise to meet exclusively in person for such an important conversation. Calls and text messages are viewed as disrespectful to the partner and cowardice. We think otherwise. Parting by SMS is the place to be. But here, too, you need to know certain rules:

- This type of breakup is ideal for girls who have been dating for a short time.

- If you are afraid of parting face-to-face, you don’t know how you will look the guy in the eyes, then SMS is the best option.

- If your boyfriend has a hot temper. Especially if he has a habit of insulting and attacking.

Psychologist's advice: In any relationship, it is important to remember the hackneyed truth that everything tends to come back.

So if you are thinking:
- just quietly evaporate, avoid meetings with the admirer and leave without explanation
- or deliberately harass him with nit-picking and, as a result, make a scandal, pour reproaches on him,

then it's not the best option. This will break the young man's heart and cause him to spend more than one day in misery. If you don't want to be dumped in the same way in the future, try to talk to the guy normally.

We part by SMS. Examples of messages from a practicing psychologist

For a break through SMS, it is also worth preparing so as not to unnecessarily hurt the feelings of a partner.

• Clearly state everything in one message. This will avoid unnecessary questions and explanations.
• Use a respectful tone and courtesy. Now is not the time or place for reproaches and insults. Blaming the guy for all the sins now does not make sense. Better to try to stay on good terms.
• Try to think ahead of possible questions and answer them ahead of time.

Message example:

Sasha, I want to talk to you seriously and frankly. I'm worried about the future of both of us. We have very different outlooks on life. In my opinion, this makes it very difficult for us to be happy. I hate to pretend It doesn't make sense anymore to pretend that everything is fine. Therefore, the best solution for us will be to leave.

I thought about it a lot and I can’t say that this decision was easy for me. But it's better for both of us. I hope you understand me and don't hold grudges. We had a lot of good things, so I will remember only this about you. I hope you will remember me only with a smile. I sincerely wish you: be happy!

Parting without resentment

If you want to break the connection with a guy, but stay on good terms with him, then do not rush to offer it to him. This hackneyed phrase: "Let's remain friends" will bring him only the pain of resentment and humiliation. Everything must be done in a timely manner.

Think for yourself. Your boyfriend didn't suspect a thing. Suddenly you tell him that you want to leave and will not change your mind under any circumstances. But appreciate everything that was between you, etc. And bam, offer friendship instead of love. Of course, the young man will be upset and refuse such an offer.

But if you do not insist on this, then his pain will subside over time and, perhaps, he himself will offer it to you later. Thus, you can break up with a guy without causing him a lot of suffering and without offending him.

He loves you, but you don't

12 important tips:

• It is considered good form to report the breakup in person, face to face. If you feel in yourself the strength to survive this unpleasant moment with dignity, and are sure that your boyfriend does not suffer from mental disorders (he will not start yelling at you and threaten you, use physical force), then arrange this meeting in advance.

The best choice of location would be a park or a quiet cafe. But not those of them where you spent a lot of pleasant moments. Choose a place where you have never been together. Let pleasant memories of you not be overshadowed by a tragic end.

• Also choose the moment carefully. Do not tell the news in front of mutual acquaintances, during a break between couples, or during a lunch break at work.
• Plan and prepare your speech. Choose honest, frank words. But do not mention his shortcomings or that he himself is to blame for everything. Moreover, there is no need to attack, humiliate and insult a young man.
• It is best to even rehearse a little in front of a mirror. Your words should sound convincing and calm. Don't use flirting. Otherwise, the guy will think that this is not serious.
• Do not give in to pity, do not cry or hug your former lover as a sign of comfort. This will also lead him to the idea that you doubt your decision and you can still turn back.
• Try to remain calm during the conversation itself. Do not slide into screaming and showdown, even if the guy provokes you. Do not succumb to his persuasions and promises to change everything. If you have decided everything, you should not go on about manipulations.
• Don't make a fuss yourself. Think carefully, where does such a desire to throw a scene come from? Most likely out of guilt. After all, you are the one who initiated the breakup. It will not be easier for you, but you can ruin your nerves. Parting is already unpleasant in itself, there is no need to aggravate everything.
• If you are leaving for another guy, then you do not need to report it. This will only further upset the ex-boyfriend. Try not to advertise it for a while. Do not appear in a common company of friends with a new passion, do not put joint photos on social networks on your ava.
• If you decide to break up with him - go to the end. And don't mess with this. Your coldness and rescheduling dates will not lead to anything good. But also consider the state of the former soulmate. If a bunch of other serious problems have piled on him now, then such news can finish off the poor fellow.
• Don't give the guy hope for a possible turn of events. Advise him to move on and wish him luck with the other girl. Emphasize that feelings have cooled and nothing can be returned.
• In the future, keep respect for your former loved one. Do not share intimate secrets with your girlfriends, do not spread bad rumors about him.
• Try not to keep in touch with the young man. After the conversation, delete his number, avoid meeting places and mutual acquaintances. Thus, your separation will bring him less mental suffering.

If love has not yet passed, but a break is inevitable

Stage 1. Decide

The most painful parting for a girl is parting with a guy you still love. You understand that relationships lead nowhere. But you love with all your heart. It is not easy to decide that everything is over and to take the first step towards breaking the connection. But it needs to be done. If you are already thinking that nothing can be fixed, then your relationship is already an upside down sheet.

Analyze everything from your acquaintance to the present moment. Think about whether something can renew warm feelings and mutual understanding? Or does it make no sense to endure his coldness and indifference, constant quarrels? This will help you make your final decision.

Stage 2. Do it

You have made a difficult decision for you. Start acting! If you are confident in your abilities that you can tell him about it by looking into his eyes, then do so. But keep in mind that you also need to answer his questions and listen to his objections. It is very likely that he will try to stop you. You must bear it all with dignity.

If, nevertheless, the feelings are so strong that it is not possible to do it personally, feel free to send an e-mail. Your goal is to get away from the harmful connection that destroys you and him as well. It does not allow you to enjoy life and create normal relationships. Therefore, all means are good here.

Stage 3. Rehabilitation

At this stage, you will have to start a new life, despite the aching pain in your chest. The main thing to remember is that the best is yet to come! This thought should motivate you to move forward.

• In no case do not fall into despondency and depression. Your attitude is very important: if you are confident that you will survive this time no matter what, then it will be so.

Psychologist's advice: Remember, millions of people have experienced what you are feeling right now! And many also managed to find their love and happiness again. You are no exception.

• Make it a rule to stir up the past as little as possible. Try not to think about the past at all. This will give you a good start to a new life.
• .Think over your life in such a way that you will not meet with him anywhere else. Communicate now in another company. This person no longer exists in your life. You have to literally delete it. Delete all photos and contacts, remove things that remind you of him.
• If the heartache does not recede in any way, express everything to a good friend, mother, sister. The best way to get rid of experiences is to throw them out.
• Spend your free time wisely. Not for playing in my head the possible reasons for parting and self-abasement. And for positive activities: meeting with friends, going to the theater or cinema. Perhaps you have long wanted to resume playing sports or something else.
• Another useful rule: do not forget to please yourself with small amenities. Do you want a new dress or change your hairstyle? Or give yourself a big surprise. Vacation at sea in a circle of good company. Whether you allow yourself to be happy is up to you.

Case from practice:

Once Olga, 23 years old, came to us for a consultation. The girl could not break off the relationship that tormented her and could not understand whether it was worth doing. In the last six months, relations with Andrey have become very cold. The young man showed obvious indifference. But he was in no hurry to part himself and denied his coldness.

Together with Olga, we analyzed after what events the attitude of her young man began to change. It turned out that her beloved accidentally met an ex-girlfriend on the street, for whom he had strong feelings. Since that time, they began to meet occasionally, as good friends. The girl was married and claimed that relations with her husband were developing remarkably.

Apparently, Andrei began to doubt his relationship with Olga and began to hope for a resumption of relations with his ex-girlfriend. But he did not want to leave, because he was afraid to confess to his former passion in his surviving feelings and did not want to be left alone. As a result, Olga made the right decision to break the connection with a man who dreamed of another woman.

Debunking Myths:

• There are women who are happy in life, they are always loved, and they never need anything. And only I had such an unfortunate fate.
  This is wrong. It is impossible to be in a state of absolute happiness and constant pleasure from life.
• Somewhere in the world there is a young man, being with whom you can be happy forever.

In fact, everyone has problems from time to time. The main thing is to be able to solve them in time so that they do not destroy love.

• True love only gets stronger with age.

In any relationship, there are different periods and stages that follow each other. First there can be an idyll, then disagreements and vice versa. It is important to be flexible and work towards each other.

Break up with your boyfriend nicely

Has your relationship brought you many happy moments? But in the end, you still decided to leave. Surely you want the gap to be a great ending. Read below for tips on how to leave a young man beautifully:

• Especially carefully prepare and think over the speech, use delicate words that can hurt the guy the least.
• Use praise, admit that he is good and has many good qualities. Tell him that his future girlfriend will be very lucky to have him. But don't overdo it! Otherwise, the guy will think that you are trying to manipulate him.
• Remember together the most joyful moments with him, and sincerely thank him for this. Your task is to gently explain that it just happened, that despite all this, the feelings have faded and cannot be returned.
• Do not give in to remorse and guilt. Remember - life is a cycle, nothing stands still. Keeping relationships that do not bring happiness and satisfaction is not an option.
• The fault of parting lies with both partners. Therefore, you should listen to the young man's point of view. To take and dump everything on him, pack your bags and leave - it would be too selfish.
• Doesn't it occur to you what words to choose? Then use the old wisdom - put yourself in the place of a partner. What would you like to hear? That's how you frame the conversation.

Psychologist's advice: A great solution for those who are afraid of such serious face-to-face conversations is to write a letter on paper. Describe to him all your feelings, why you decided to break up. Write and hand over this letter personally. Such an act will look honest and beautiful. Smooth out your indecision in this way)

How to understand that everything went well?

You just told your loved one that it's over. How to understand that he understood your words? Look closely at his face. What does it express? Sadness, longing, confusion? So you did great. This is a normal reaction of a person who has just been dumped by a girl.

If there is a sly smile on his face, then in some way you were not convincing enough. Perhaps you were too flirtatious? Or did he see regret in your eyes? In any case, you were not taken seriously. So just turn around and leave. Do not get in touch with him anymore, this will make him comprehend your words.

You now have a complete guide to breaking up with a guy the right way, nicely, and in the way you want. Get started right now, don't procrastinate.

In life, there are simple situations, and there are not so. Very often there are confusing and complicated relationships. And no matter how many tips the girls re-read, it is difficult to make a decision on their own and do everything right.

Only a psychologist with extensive experience behind him will be able to objectively assess the situation and help find the best solution. And also quickly and painlessly end unwanted relationships. We will be happy to help you with your question. Together we will work out your specific situation and find the best solution. Together we will succeed!

Parting with a loved one is the most difficult step in life. With age, we become wiser, and it is easier for us to do certain things. But when there is still no experience in parting, it is difficult to dare eternal separation if the feeling of love still warms the soul. But you can look at it from the other side, for many girls, breaking up with a guy means becoming happier. But how can this process be made painless for two people who until recently were happy together? Everything in our life is quite simple, we ourselves complicate everything, and then we complain about our difficult life. To make every day a joy, you need to remember that everything in this world is not eternal, even loneliness.

Love or breakup - the choice is not easy

If you still love a person, but want to end the relationship, you need to prepare for the worst. If you do not know with the guy you love, then the following tips will help you decide on temporary loneliness. All psychologists advise not to delay the decision. If love bothers you, it's time for a change. No one says that the process of breaking up is an easy path to happiness. But strong girls are not looking for simple ways, and this is a fact. At the end of a difficult road, a pleasant gift awaits you - this is the law of life, it is undeniable.

Don't delay the moment

Neither of the couple will feel better if you delay this unpleasant process. Cutting a living man is a thousand times more prudent than torturing a man with his coldness. The sooner you tell your loved one that it's time for you to leave, the less mutual accusations and reproaches will be. Perhaps this news will surprise him, or perhaps he himself understands that parting will benefit the two of you. If you constantly think about the one you love, the advice of a psychologist will come in handy. Taking into account the recommendations of professionals, you can survive any gap painlessly. And then negative emotions will not overwhelm you from the intensity of passions that have appeared in your life.

To be more tolerant is the lot of strong girls

The basic and most important rule is to let the person talk. Perhaps he has something to say to you, or he just wants to say goodbye to you in a way that will remain friends. When parting, a person always wants to talk. The ability to say what you think in time helps to maintain respect for each other.

Remember that the taboo when breaking up a relationship is parting in public. It’s a complete humiliation for a guy to be abandoned in front of strangers, you will also be uncomfortable with this situation. Therefore, if your breakup was provoked by a quarrel, make sure that you are left alone, others do not need to listen to your scandals.

It is very important to put yourself in the place of a partner, to feel his emotions, so to speak, to be in his shoes. And here a dilemma arises: how to part with the guy you love painlessly, how to feel what he feels if there is no bright love for him left in your heart? Would you like a guy to say goodbye to you the way you do? If not, make the breakup less painful for both of you.

When love is still in your heart

If love still lives in your heart, but you understand that this feeling does not make you a happy person, then what is the point of such a relationship? Naturally, this feeling has grown into attachment, and the latter into a habit, and it is too difficult to eradicate all this. But life is given for this, to live as we see fit. If you feel that love is choking you from the inside, eradicate it before it's too late. It is hard to believe that you can be unhappy with a dear person. You catch yourself thinking more and more often: I love a guy, but I want to leave, what to do. And you can not find the answer to your question. How to break up with him, so as not to feel guilty? This is another question that torments many girls.

What to do?

Breakups are an integral part of our lives. And often we offend those who are dear to us. If you have made the decision to leave, no persuasion should stop you. After a while, you will realize that it was a hard choice that gave you freedom. Love makes us put on the dress of the person we may not have wanted to be. It makes us submit to another, illuminates us and makes life brighter. There are always pluses and minuses, and if you understand that loving and being unhappy is not for you, start acting. Your girlfriends often complain about their young people, and you constantly think: how I want to break up with a guy, but I love him. And you don’t see a way out of the situation. It happens often, as if you are walking in a circle and you understand that you want to get out of it, but something always stops you. You realize that tomorrow everything will be different, no one will write or call, and you do not understand how to live on.

Pity in love will lead to nothing

You feel sorry for yourself, you regret those days that you will no longer spend together with him. But who knows, maybe by breaking off relations with him, you will meet a more worthy person and find long-awaited happiness. Very often, in order to break up with a guy, we need other people's advice, the opinion of adults who already have the wisdom that does not allow us to make mistakes. And here the advice of professionals who know a lot about love comes to the rescue. If you don't know how to break up with the guy you love, advice from experienced people will help you. It can be an older sister who has already learned the process of breaking up, a mother, or maybe even a grandmother. Each of them will judge by their relationship, advise them to do as they would have done in their time. But do not forget that you are not them, your relationship is not their relationship. All you have to do is listen, memorize and draw conclusions. Perhaps you will listen to their advice, or maybe you will do everything your own way, which is more likely. But the truth is that the older generation knows what they are talking about, their advantage is that they have already gone through all this: pain, resentment, parting. Therefore, their advice should be taken into account, and you should listen to what they say, it definitely won’t get any worse.

Breakup or suffering? The choice is yours

And if thoughts are still spinning in your head: I want to break up with a guy, but I love him, you should do one thing - break off relations with him. Psychologists recommend initially putting on paper everything that you want to say when parting. Write everything exactly as you would like to tell him, pour out all your emotions and thoughts, and then the process of parting will be painless for both of you. Well, if the words have become lumpy in your throat, write him a letter and give it to him personally. This method of parting is a little naive, but then you will definitely say what you planned. Paper can endure everything, even the most degrading words that you would like to communicate to it. Do not be ashamed of your weakness, this is the normal state of any person. You don't have to tell the guy everything to his face.

If he doesn't love

It also happens that it's time to break up with a guy, as you understand that he does not love you. But you have strong feelings for him. Everything is more complicated here, here you can blame yourself until the last days of your life that you took the wrong step. But this is not so, if you love a guy, but he does not love you - these are not real feelings. In any interpretation, the feeling must be mutual. Therefore, if you are thinking about how to break up with the guy you love, but he doesn’t have you, think over a thorough breakup plan so that you don’t regret what you did later. For him, this parting will be painless, but you can eat pies for weeks at night, eating your pain from surging loneliness. No one has ever died from being alone. Everything has its charms. Temporary loneliness is not the end of the world.

Temporary loneliness on the path to happiness

The advantage of loneliness is that it is a temporary event. Sooner or later you will meet the guy of your dreams and forget about those who were not worthy of you. All that remains for you is to take the will into a fist and start acting. Cut on the living, but without a knife, speak sharply and clearly, so that he believes you. And go away, be proud and confident, guys admire these qualities. Remember one simple rule: never send SMS to the guy you broke up with, but you love him madly. If you have made a decision, do not give up, be self-confident, do not give in to momentary weaknesses. After a while, you will realize that this SMS was superfluous, and he would not appreciate such an act. If they parted, then finally, why the whole farce? A week or two will not change anything, sooner or later such a person will disappear from your life and will never remember you. It is difficult to take and change fate, to throw a person out of your life, it is difficult, but everything is possible.

Seriousness or frivolity?

The guy's unwillingness to have a serious relationship suggests that he lives for himself. Such a man meets, walks, has fun and leaves his passions. Sooner or later, you will want a more serious relationship with this person, but he will only have short-term hobbies in his mind. What could be worse than neglect? If you constantly suspect him of lying, he does not inform you when his plans change, this guy is not worthy of your attention. Worse than neglect can only be the extinction of passions. If this feeling between you has not been discussed for a long time, what is the point of such a relationship?

Neglect has no place in a relationship

Another question is how to part with the guy you love and who uses you. This is the most painstaking process, because it is difficult to get rid of love for a person to whom you are attached with all your soul and heart, especially if he does not let you go because of his own benefit. . Then various manipulations can take place. As soon as you notice such manifestations, immediately begin to act, do not wait for a special occasion.

It's hard to leave a guy you're dependent on for one reason or another. A person who hurts you, and knowingly, for his own benefit, does not deserve your love. There are always reasons to think about your relationship. Indifference kills even the strongest love. If you stop counting on his help and support, you notice that he is comfortable, but you are not, it's time to ring the bells. If a guy doesn't care about you, then he doesn't care, what could be worse?

You ceased to interest him, he began to pay attention to other girls, it's time to talk heart to heart. Every man wants to look at beautiful women, but there should be a limit to everything. Constant control also does not speak of boundless love, it is most likely an indicator of distrust. And if there is no this feeling, what kind of relationship can we talk about? He began to consider you his property, so it's time to get rid of such a candidate.

Guys worry about breakups too.

We are all sure that the guys do not worry about the breakup, that they do not care what happens next. But, as it turned out, this is not so, men are also weak, especially if they are in love. Being depressed is normal, we are all human, each of us has emotions. Sometimes even guys are more upset than girls. If a man breaks up with a woman because of her infidelity, these can be the worst months after a breakup in his life. Therefore, you should not think that guys do not regret, do not get upset, do not cry. They also have feelings, they also love and want to be loved. Therefore, if you decide to leave, do it not by phone, not by SMS, but in person.

Look into each other's eyes and say what you think. Perhaps fate will bring you together again in many years, perhaps you will never see this person again. In any situation, it is important to remain worthy, not to cause people the pain that you would not want to experience yourself. And only then kindness, harmony and immense happiness will prevail in your life. And what could be better than to love and be loved?